1) How resource-hungy is BEPU while a simulation remains still- (if a tower of bricks remains untouched)?
If it manages to go to deactivate, it's very cheap. It still incurs a cost in the broad phase and a few miscellaneous other bookkeeping sections, but those are much, much cheaper than running the full pipeline including narrow phase collision detection and collision solving.
It's not absolutely free, though. If there's 50,000 sleeping objects, you'll still feel it. It won't be anywhere near as expensive as having 50,000 active objects, but it could still eat into the simulation budget. (For
reference, a 3770K at 4.5ghz can run the broad phase for 10,000 sparse boxes in 0.2 milliseconds. The total cost for sleeping objects will be a bit higher than this in a regular simulation depending on the number of sleeping collision pairs.)
2) Regarding terrain, what's the optimal setup with BEPU in terms of the size of bricks (for example) in comparison with the size of the terrain squares. In some engines the bricks need to be much smaller than the terrain squares or performance takes a hit. The problem with this is that I don't want anything more elaborate that vertex based texture splatting for the terrain visuals- if your terrain squares need to be huge for optimal physics, it limits you to very vague texturing.
The cost of collision detection with terrain increases roughly linearly with the number of triangles that must be tested against colliders as determined by overlapping bounding boxes. The denser the terrain, the more expensive it will be.
I'd expect having triangles around twice the size of a box or wider would produce decent results. The worst case there is 8 triangles tested with one such box. For comparison, the worst case for triangles roughly the width of the box would be 18 tests. The number of triangles that need to be tested for smaller widths increases from there quite quickly.